


Napkin Lips

by aam5ever



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Angels, Demons, Fluff, M/M, like imagine a not-cursing Michael, tbh I thought this would be funny
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-27
Updated: 2014-11-27
Packaged: 2018-02-27 05:26:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2680733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aam5ever/pseuds/aam5ever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Angels can purify even the foulest of mouths with a kiss.<br/>Oh look, Gavin's an angel.<br/>And Michael's a pretty foul mouthed guy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Kiss and Explain

**Author's Note:**

> Dude, this idea has been stewing in my mind for a while.  
> I apologize, since these following chapters will be short ones.  
> But hopefully they're entertaining!

"FUCKING. SHIT." The Jersey man screamed at the screen. Usually, Gavin would leave the room when this happened, but he had a plan. "Move your fat ass! Go, you prick! You son of a BITCH!" A plan that was more like a prank.

Angels and humans co-existed in this world; people that performed enough good deeds in life were granted the title, along with wings and a halo. Simple things to hide. One thing angels couldn't hide was their kindness. Gavin and Jack were the angels of the Achievement Hunter six. The rest were human, except for the special case of their very own demon, Ryan, who was a whole different story.

Anyway, Gavin's plan consisted of this:  
1\. Kiss Michael straight on the mouth.  
2\. Observe and laugh.

There was a method to his madness, he swears.

Once Michael was done recording, he threw off his headphones and grumbled angrily to himself. Pushing up his glasses, the redhead turned and saw Gavin's shit-eating grin.

"What the fuck are you smiling at?" He questioned, still a little pissed. "Your halo's appeared."

"Oh, darn it." Gavin snatched the metal golden large ring from its floating position above his head. He hardly summoned his wings, but his halo usually appeared when he was thinking. Most people didn't know that, so they assumed it was out of random. With little effort, the halo was gone in a 'poof', leaving only small shimmers behind. Then, Gavin turned his attention to Michael. "If I... do something... don't freak out too much, okay?"

"What do you mean?" Michael was curious, and slightly cautious. When Gavin didn't respond, he got annoyed. "Can you at least explain further, idiot?"

"I, not really- well, I can just-" And then Gavin pulled him closer and kissed him. Michael tensed up at first, then relaxed. Silently, he thanked God nobody else was in the spacious office. Was this Gavin's way of admitting his feelings for him? Did he know that Michael's been waiting for this for a long time? When the angel pulled away, he was... dazed, to say the least.

Michael stared at him in disbelief. "Gee-wilickers, Gav..." The look of confusion that passed on his face caused Gavin to stifle a giggle. "What in the world?" 

Now, that threw Gavin into hysterics. "It worked! I can't believe it worked!" With the added bonus of him kissing Michael Jones, of course.

His friend's brow furrowed. "Gavin, what the ship- ship?! I meant to say ship, not ship!" He was getting angrier by the second. "What the fudge?"

While he was fuming, Gavin was unbelievably amused. "Oh my goodness, this is absolutely wonderful."

"WHAT THE FREAK, GAVIN?!" He obviously didn't mean to say 'freak'. "What the hay did you do to me?"

"Angel kisses can... purify mouths." Was his explanation. "You can't curse!"

There was a beat of silence.

"What the FRIG, GAVIN?" He yelled. "Why the fudge would you do that to me, you poopy head?" He held his head in his hands. "This is freaking ridiculous."

"I've been kind of fed up with your potty mouth." Gavin shrugged. "Only I can reverse it." He totally felt the power he held over Michael. Blackmail at its finest. "And I have five tasks for you to do."

Five tasks. Was he kidding Michael? "Are you serious? Are you abso- fudging- lutely serious?" He groaned at hearing himself. "What are they." Anything. He'd do anything to get back the ability to verbally assault without sounding like a fifth grader.

"First one," The British angel was counting it on his fingers. "is to make Geoff something. A sweater, a hat, just knit him something that he can wear. Oh, I have an idea." He then decided to get a notepad. Gavin wrote the first one down for Michael. He wrote the other five down so he could just list them off. "Second, braid Jack's beard for him. I'm sure he'll appreciate it." He saw Michael's nose twitch in displeasure. "Third one is Ray. Get him five Achievements in games he's already played." 

That one was what got Michael. "What?" He threw his hands up angrily. "Every frigging game Ray's played is either perfected or has some cowcrud-hard Achievement! No fudging way am I going to do that malarky!" God, he sounded terrible speaking like that.

Gavin tsked as he looked up at him. "I hope you like using words like 'malarky ' for the rest of your life." His smug grin made Michael groan and rub his face in agitation.

"What're the last two?"

"I'm glad you asked." The Brit turned his attention to the notepad again. "Fourth is to play a scary game with Ryan." He shivered himself. "He loves those. They're so creepy..." He remembered playing Outlast with the demon. He had to cuddle up to him because his poor fragile angel heart could barely take it. 

"Okay... I guess the last one's you?" Michael was looking much more patient. 

"Right-O." The Jerseyite rolled his eyes at Gavin. "You have to make ME curse." He smirked. "Good luck, dummy."

"Isn't that, like, against your whole angel code?" His friend asked.

He shook his head. "It's only frowned upon. I've heard people like me curse like sailors before." He handed the notepad over to Michael, and only then did the redhead realize the cover of the notepad was littered with kittens, hearts, and smiley faces. 

"No fudging way." He turned it over to show Gavin, who only smiled in response.

"Rule #1: Don't harm the notepad." He said as a warning. Michael could feel his insanity meter slowly inching upwards. "Rule #2: Do those exactly in that order." He was speaking of the tasks. "Rule #3: Don't harm me either, you doughnut." Gavin saw one of his friend's fist clenched. "Rule #4: Don't tell anyone."

Michael could do nothing else but sigh. "When do I start?"

"It doesn't matter." Gavin turned back to his computer. "Take your time." The longer he didn't swear, the better for the angel.


	2. The Best Socks Ever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sweaters... Scarves... Mittens...
> 
> But no, Michael chose socks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I warned you about the short chapters!

So Gavin wanted knitting? Oh, he was gonna give him knitting. The best knitting ever. He was gonna knit the FUCK out of whatever he was making. Knit the absolute SHIT out of it.

Now, if only he could say those words.

Michael sat in his apartment, on the floor, knitting supplies in front of him. 

Now, if only he knew how to knit.

"This is complete horse poop." Michael sighed. "Why in the world is this my life right now?" He picked up one of the knitting needles. "How far can I jab this into my eye until it punctures my brain?"

Instead of participating in such gruesome activities, he pulled up a knitting video on YouTube. The first video he clicked on was a girl knitting a sweater way too fast for him to keep up with. The second one was a man with a soothing voice. Michael enlarged the video and found out he was making socks. 

"First," The man started. "you have to pick three colors." Michael chose dark green, black, and gold, since it matched Geoff's minecraft character. "Then, establish a pattern." Green, gold, black. Next? "And then you..." And that's where things got complicated.

The Jerseyite, at first, was having a lot of trouble. There was a formation for this? Why did he need to knot that? He had to start the video over about six times before he realized his mistakes. Eventually, he got the hang of it. Loops and pulls came naturally. 

How mad was he gonna get when he realized how much easier a scarf was to knit?

Nonetheless, he continued his work. A loop here, a pull there... it was a trance. A slow trance, yes, but a slightly rewarding one. It took him an hour to finish his first sock, but no time to continue onto the next. The video finished a long time ago, but Michael didn't even bother to start it over. He was in the knitting zone now. Drawn in by his work. He hadn't even heard his phone ring.

It was eight o'clock by the time Michael finished. Hunger hadn't really been apparent until he was finally finished with his work. He also hadn't noticed that he had been basically sitting in silence for two and a half hours. 

Maybe knitting should be his new thing.

Getting up, Michael stretched and glanced down at the striped socks he made. Proud, the redhead finally checked his phone.

Gavin, and then Ray, had called. Ray probably did just to make a quick joke. Gavin had left a voicemail.

"Hey, Mikey!" Michael hated that nickname. "Hope the knitting is treating you well." And then the voicemail ended. Well, at least he bothered to check in on him.

Putting the knitting tools away in a box that may or may not ever be mentioned again, he closed his laptop and sighed. Time to figure out how to tell Geoff why the socks were necessary. But first, dinner.

The next day was a cloudy one. Geoff had been talking to Ryan and Gavin about the upcoming Let's Plays.

"So, should we release the Cloudberry Kingdom one first?" He asked. "Or the new Far Cry 4?"

"Far Cry 4 might be more relevant." Ryan logically explained. The man had two different colored eyes. His natural blue one was to the left. The other one was a threatening red, to indicate that yes, he was a creature born from Hellfire.

Gavin frequently teased him about his eyes.

Ryan frequently scared Gavin half to death.

Michael came through the door, one hand holding coffee, the other holding a white party bag. He sipped the coffee and narrowed his eyes at Gavin before greeting everyone.

"Morning." He said. They all returned the greeting, and Geoff decided to speak up.

"What's that, Michael?" He asked.

The redhead smirked. "Glad you asked." He plopped it down on his boss' desk. "It's a gift, Geoff, for being such an amazing boss."

"What is it?" Gavin asked from across the room. Michael shot him a look before smiling again.

"Open it."

Geoff cast a questioning gaze up at him before opening it from his seat. A pair of striped black, green, and gold socks came out of the bag, and Gavin was stifling his giggles.

The tattooed man smirked slightly. "You... bought me socks."

Michael shook his head. "MADE you socks." 

"...is there a reason?" He asked. 

"Only for being such a great boss." 

Ryan cracked a grin. "So do we get gifts too?" And leaned back in his chair. "I did, you know, edit lots of GTA, so..."

"Maybe later on, Ry." Michael patted his shoulder before going to his desk. "Like when I'm dead."

They all laughed at that, and Gavin gave Michael an amused expression. So far, so good. Michael tried his best not to speak for the rest of the day, hoping to mask his tampered-with speech.

Also, for the rest of the day, Geoff wore socks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: aam5ever  
> Message me!!!


	3. Braiding Jack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Exactly what the title says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been super busy, I almost forgot about this!  
> Almost.

How the fudge will I convince Jack that I should braid is beard?

Michael groaned. The cursing he wished to do couldn't even be written on paper. Grumbling, he slid it over to the angel to the other side of him. Gavin read it, giggled, then slipped it back to him with an answer.

Get creative.

"Get creative, my behind." Michael murmured, annoyed. Gavin's stifled laughter only fueled his anger.

"You alright there, Michael?" Ray asked as he was playing Geometry Wars 3. His character died, and he said an obsene phrase. 

Michael nodded, and turned back to his editing. Boy, this was gonna be a hard one to do.

Or maybe not.

When lunchtime rolled around, he, Jack, and Ryan went to the kitchen to get something to eat. Jack had a sandwich, along with Michael. Ryan only pulled out a box of Cheez-It's from a cabinet. Jack shot him a questioning look.

"I'm not really hungry." Was his excuse. "Just... snack-ish." Who knew a demon could have such an appetite for cheese snacks?

On their way back, Michael worked up the courage to ask Jack a question. "So, Jack..." 

"Uh huh?" The bearded man looked over at him, fixing his glasses. 

"Would you mind if I, uh..." This was so stupid. "Braided your beard?"

There was a moment of silence before Jack chuckled lightheartedly. He gave the redhead a weird look. "What?"

"I wanted to practice my braiding." God. Darn. It. MICHAEL. "I wanna try it so I can surprise Lindsay and braid her hair." He knew how to braid, he just needed a somewhat -not really- plausible excuse.

"Aw~" Jack gushed, causing the other to redden. Thankfully, Geoff and Ryan were gone from their seat when they got back to their office. "Fine, just try not to tug on it too much, okay?"

"I'll try my best." Geez, he sounded like a schoolboy. They sat down, and put their lunches on the desks. Michael sat in Ryan's seat, next to Jack. 

Jack scooted forward, laughing at Michael's odd behavior. "Are you okay? You're awfully... nice, lately." 

"Can't a guy just braid another guy's beard?" Oh God, this was making him sick. Not being able to curse was taking a toll on him.

"Well, it's not very usual..." Jack said, but still let Michael touch his ginger facial hair. Carefully, he began to weave the coarse hair. 

The braid he began to make was sloppy at first. "Fudge." He hissed. While undoing it, Jack shook with laughter.

"Was that- Did Michael 'Rage Quit' Jones just self-censor himself?" He said in between laughing. Michael only bit his lip and tried to braid it again. They sat like that for a while, Michael trying to do a good braid while Jack patiently just accepted it. At one point, Ryan and Geoff came back in, but both didn't say a word.

Once he was done, Michael sat back in the chair and sighed. "Done." He said, as if it was a great triumph. It kind of was, to be honest. They've been sitting there for a while, and Michael messed up multiple times. As if on cue, Gavin walked in as well, and saw his accomplishment. 

"Well played, Michael Jones." He said to himself, making sure nobody heard him. The angel simply went over to his desk as Ryan and Geoff teased the angry coworker. 

Ryan's eyes switched from blue to half blue, half red. "When did our office turn into the hair salon?" He chuckled, amused. 

"More like beard salon." Geoff giggled. "What the fuck?"

Michael only shook his head, embarrassed, and went to his desk. Jack stopped his own chuckling after a while.

"Thanks." He cheerfully said to redhead, who smirked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: aam5ever

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr: aam5ever  
> Message me!


End file.
